It seems lately that not a week goes by without a news story appearing in the Washington Post or another national newspaper about a middle school case of “sexting,” the act of sending or receiving sexually provocative photos, videos, or written materials via text message, email, or web posting. This Saturday’s piece in the Post, entitled “Students Paid to Look at Photos” tells a fairly typical story. The lead sentence begins, “A Bethesda middle school student allegedly rented his iPod Touch to classmates who clicked through images of female classmates and other girls in various states of undress.” Authorities investigating this particular case believe it had been going on for several months without adult detection. Even though they note “the girls seem to have willingly posed for the photos off school grounds and outside school hours, and then text-messaged or emailed the images to other students,” authorities are investigating whether any crimes were committed.
While it may be uncomfortable for adults to discuss these kinds of things with their children, and even though most adults can’t keep up with or imagine the kinds of uses kids are going to dream up for the abundant technology they have at their fingertips, it is wise for all parents whose kids have computers, webcams, phones, digital cameras, or access to email, YouTube, or FaceBook to have some precautionary discussions. It’s not that you’ll be giving them ideas. They’re way ahead of us with most of these things, but they likely haven’t thought through the possible consequences.
In addition to discussing the inappropriateness of this kind of behavior, parents need to make sure their children understand the potentially viral nature of anything that gets placed on a digital device. One can never be certain where an email, text message, video, photo, or social networking posting will end up or who will see it. While I realize how hopelessly out of it this seems, kids need to be helped to realize that a good rule of thumb to adopt is this: only transmit or post items you would feel comfortable with your grandmother seeing. One only has to consider stories of secondary schools, colleges, or potential employers routinely checking out applicants’ FaceBook pages in order to recognize the public nature of the material and the fact that it can haunt its creators -- or victims -- for years to come.
Then there are the legal ramifications. A piece in the New York Times a couple of weeks ago told about the transmission of inappropriate photos from a 12 year old girl’s sleepover party. Authorities in that case were weighing the imposition of child pornography charges. In another case of photos exchanged between an 18 year old boyfriend and his 14 year old girlfriend, the boy was found guilty of distributing obscene materials to a minor and was placed on the sex offenders registry. More commonly, there are two basic scenarios according to the Times piece: a teenager sharing an inappropriate photo with a partner, or a partner or ex-partner widely distributing such a photo. It’s not that these practices are as rare as adults may hope. The article cited a recent survey in which 1 in 5 teenagers reported having engaged in sexting.
Clearly all of this is uncharted territory. Various jurisdictions and legal entities are beginning to think about how best to reshape their laws around these realities. Still, even though our Upper School Life Skills classes cover this topic, it is wise for parents to take a proactive stance with their children so that they can help them think through the ramifications of these kinds of behaviors.